We’re sitting at Paul Shaffer’s piano before trivia starts. I tell my teammates how crazy it is that Paul only had two jobs his whole life¹, first on SNL and then Letterman. Abe mentions that he has a crush on
Well respected, successful older actor Gary Busey is working on an independent film. On the studio lot, he runs into a director¹ he used to work for. Someone told him this director was hoping to cast him in his next
I’m in a cramped office, advising Elon Musk on how to spend his money. Me: “Try EVERYTHING, no matter how absurd it sounds.” He decides to open a brewery at the top of any ancient hill in Greece. He tries
Khloé Kardashian tells me the singer Adele has died.¹ Kelly gets sad when she hears of Adele’s death. For an unknown reason, I pretend I didn’t already know. We’re hosting a party at a hip restaurant. As Dave and Aimee
Aubrey Plaza points out that there’s an understated female Olympian who owns a chain of about fifty pharmacies that are essentially equidistant, scattered around the continental United States. She says it in a way like we need to keep our
Mark wins $1000 from a Christmas scratch-off. He doesn’t offer to share any of the money with anyone else, not even Ricky Gervais, who bought him the ticket, or to a lesser extent me, who scratched the winner for him
I’m playing basketball and getting a lot of steals. Mindy Kaling, who’s coaching the other team, takes me aside and asks matter-of-factly, not in a mean way, “Do you think your style of play is helping our girls prepare for
I’m in the lineup to get into an outdoor restaurant. The couple at the nearest table warns me they might be awhile, which isn’t too impactful considering how many other tables there are. All the same, they do look like
Cyndi Lauper is on the roof of St. Pat’s church. The proctor¹ doesn’t see her but keeps an eye on us to make sure we’re not up to anything fishy, and eventually he goes back inside. We brainstorm ideas, looking
A bachelor party is going on in my backyard, with Edward Snowden and Tom Delonge trying to get me to join them. I politely decline without using my words, and instead I go the house next door. Chrissy and Ashley
