A bachelor party is going on in my backyard, with Edward Snowden and Tom Delonge trying to get me to join them. I politely decline without using my words, and instead I go the house next door. Chrissy and Ashley have just finished raising the ceiling 1/4 of an inch. Although I don’t notice much of a difference, they clearly did a lot of work so I told them it made the room seem much bigger, “not in dimensions but definitely in volume“.

Tonya and I are spinning around the living room, talking about how many people we went to high school with and how crazy it is that, fifteen years later, we’re all in the same place again. She’s referring to Chaytor, Louie, Hogan and Forsey, but I’m moreso thinking about Joe, Baker and Purce.

An additional verse to “Sun in an Empty Room” plays after the song is supposed to be over. I try to sing along but am dumbfounded by the new lyrics. I try to get everyone’s attention with a, “What the hell? Was this always in it?!” and it works, but not like I’d hoped for. To reduce the tension I created, I start doing a one-man long form improv scene. It’s going well but I stop abruptly when I hear a familiar sound. My friends tell me to keep going, with one of them sincerely shouting,“”We want to hear what happens with the grandmother!”

Chrissy walks out the door with moderate fanfare. I question our goodbye. “Is she leaving for good? Or just going out for a smoke? If she’s coming back, then the goodbye was a little excessive, but if she’s leaving to go back to Terrace then she deserves a better send-off.”

June 21 – Edward Snowden gets his invitation turned down to join him at a backyard bachelor party
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