The northernest European region boasts the highest quality of life, the freshest air, the loveliest accents, the Karl Ove Knausgaards, and the greatest expanse of useful regional terms. This last aspect is called the Scandinavian Sprawl, and it permeates your
I’m walking my friends home from the bar because the air is crisp and the friends are clean. As we approach their place, I acknowledge that I will not be immediately continuing on. There’s unfinished business inside, and although I’m
Years ago I read The Game and considered for a moment using magic and peacocks to further my relationship goals. However, I quickly realized it would take more than that, due to my many idiosyncrasies, outlined below, in case you
Hey, I cook too! But I’m no foodie, whatever the jesus that is. I don’t Instagram my suppers as the delay in eating leads to unnecessarily cooling of the meal. I don’t blog about the freshest kale I just ate.
I have a neat little knick-knack for you, in the form of a new illusion you can play on your friends and acquaintances. It’s one my father taught me years ago when I was just a wee child. For it
I have this protégé now. It’s really strange having someone look up to me like he does, but pretty interesting too. Before this, I never felt like my actions made a difference in anyone else’s life but my own. Now
We’re definitely on our way out as a species, but it’s still unknown which catastrophe is going to be the one to kill us off. We all know the obvious possibilities, what with the sun burning out, a meteor smacking
I’m biracial too. My mom is white like a ghost, and my dad is white like an egg. After a few drinks, she sometimes says aloud that she wishes she married Denzel Washington. Like he’d have her! That’s about as
I was walking home the other day and noticed a guy halfway down an alley smoking what I can only describe as the reefer. He noticed me noticing him and then turned around quickly so that I wouldn’t see his
How come old people are the only ones who get to be 80 years young? Some kid who’s been alive for like 2 years, I can see how he’s 2 years young. But come on. Granny? She old as trees.
