I’m at work and I go to the bathroom, where there are no walls, only stalls and toilets. A creepy man is standing by one of the female stalls, presumed to be a maintenance guy, but also presumed to be a creepy maintenance guy. Turning around and looking outside, I notice that we are at the top of a cliff. An injured barbary ape baby is lying in the grass, being comforted by a wise fox. A few crow and gull scouts come up slowly and start sniffing around to see what’s happening, and eventually all the birds swoop down, in three second intervals, and try to pick up the ape to carry him away. We realize we need to help him, so we go down to scare off the birds. It initially works, but a bear comes up instead. He just stares at us briefly and then leaves. I drag the ape inside and run back to the office to tell my boss that we own an ape now and I’m keeping it. I run back to his side and see that the ape and Tuna (I brought her in for ‘bring your pet to work’ day) are cuddling, back-to-back, lying down in a mirror image. Snakes are floating and dangling in the air during this time, with more appearing just to watch the cuddle. I try to get my camera out as quickly as possible because Kelly will be upset if she misses seeing it, but as I take it out of my pocket, the ape and Tuna start play fighting. This quickly turns into real fighting which I then have to break up.
And that’s why I don’t think we’ll be able to get another cat.
[Dreamor’s note: I was wearing jogging pants the entire time, and although no one mentioned it, I could tell that they all thought it was inappropriate work attire.]