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2018

February 12 – Judy Blume gets my self-identification as a writer

February 12 – Judy Blume gets my self-identification as a writer

I used to write too. Now I only wait. For it all to slow down. To get easier. For inspiration. To remember who I want to be. I’m not sure if I can keep it up. Once I admit it’s

iansmitty February 12, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

February 11 – Sheryl Crow gets a tale of reliability and friendship

February 11 – Sheryl Crow gets a tale of reliability and friendship

Now I know you’re all cawed out at this point, but I have to tell you about these two crows who follow me to work every day from the train station. The walk takes about five minutes. Without fail, they

iansmitty February 11, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

February 10 – Chloë Grace Moretz gets a rumination on the forgotten generation in the cycle of discipline

February 10 – Chloë Grace Moretz gets a rumination on the forgotten generation in the cycle of discipline

I feel like our parents’ generation had it the worst when it comes to all manner of discipline and related techniques. Everyone before them, for thousands of years, they all got hit as kids, when they were being little scallions

iansmitty February 10, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

February 9 – Tom Scharpling gets an underdog story, starring the black sheep of the loaf

February 9 – Tom Scharpling gets an underdog story, starring the black sheep of the loaf

Not often, but every now and then – once in a moon’s turn, when the yeast is at its silliest – the heel actually becomes the best piece of bread in the loaf. I know, I know, “How can that

iansmitty February 9, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays 2 Comments Read more

February 8 – Seth Green gets a deli counter’s sneaky upsell attempt

February 8 – Seth Green gets a deli counter’s sneaky upsell attempt

Standing at the deli counter, I ask for 75g of parmesan salami – the good salami, the $3.49/lb one, the one that shows your girlfriend you don’t mind throwing a bit of cash around. Now I’m well versed in the

iansmitty February 8, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

February 7 – Chris Rock gets a crafty way to get time off work

February 7 – Chris Rock gets a crafty way to get time off work

I recently started working for a company that gives a couple of weeks parental leave when you get a new dog. Now don’t tell my boss, but I started adopting all these elderly pooches in a vacation-extending scheme, and so

iansmitty February 7, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

February 6 – Tom Brokaw gets a specific desire for an iced coffee

February 6 – Tom Brokaw gets a specific desire for an iced coffee

As we both sit here, I want an iced coffee, but with none of the diluting ice. You see what I want is hot coffee, boiling hot, and then I want to wait, for as long as it takes, for

iansmitty February 6, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

February 5 – Michael Sheen gets Brunched

February 5 – Michael Sheen gets Brunched

So we came up with this really great webseries, about a weekly open mic event, called – wait for it – Open Michael. The main guy, Mike Hunt, is the host. One girl calls him Hot Michael, but mostly he’s

iansmitty February 5, 2018December 31, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

February 4 – Hannibal Buress gets a plea for a pivot in his performing career

February 4 – Hannibal Buress gets a plea for a pivot in his performing career

I know you really don’t want this put on you, and it might not be fair to pressure you like this – but you must acknowledge that the Cosby bit that you did and got recorded and uploaded by a

iansmitty February 4, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

February 3 – Warwick Davis gets a study of postal signature devices

February 3 – Warwick Davis gets a study of postal signature devices

I was at the post office the other day picking up a package, and I had to sign my name on the signature machine there. If anyone’s ever been a part of this, you know that the signature is never

iansmitty February 3, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more
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