iSmith: First off, I’d like to thank you for taking the time to talk with us today about your 2018 celebrity birthday messages. Ian: It’s nothing, really. I’m grateful that somebody is actually interested enough to want to discuss this
Dear big man in your big chair in your big office on the top floor in the corner of that floor, You know something? Feck ouf. Not in a mean way, but I’m plain sick of you. I accepted the
It’s not your fault I can’t get through you. I’ve been busy, okay, and I know you’ve heard all the excuses before, but mine are all true all the same. I enjoyed the 316 pages I did read, so much,
As a businessman who does business things while on business trips, I often return from these business trips as well. Today is one of those days, and I find an unenveloped letter on my coffee table Dear Homeowner: I would
[Editor’s note: There are several separate sections to this, all written at various times over the last three years, including before the election, so there are certain references to him not winning, à la Dewey Defeats Truman. The long length
Today is the one day I don’t even really want you as the intended recipient to read it, but I left it anyway because it led to one of those moments that messed with me in the way the world
I know you now have a baby daughter, which must be incredible and incomparable and insane, and I’m sure that Marlow will follow in your feet and end up having a net positive impact on the world, which isn’t easy
Open pickle jars? Best way to get to those tasty pickles. Open relationships? I could see how they can work, although they require a level of trust rarely seen in this day’s age. Open bars? Love ’em. But open letters?
iSmith: We’ve had a lot of fun here over the years, giggling and wriggling, tossing in a chortle every now and then. But it’s time to get serious. Human issues. (I push a physical button on the table, similar to
I know you like getting free stuff, and it must be nice to be in a position to make that happen. But there’s also the opposite of free stuff, and that comes in the form getting scammed. Sometimes that scamming
