iSmith

iSmith

Menu

  • PROJECTS
    • Brunch
    • Executive Producer
    • Siralop Ezirp
    • New Yukker
    • Album Covers
    • Henry+Garfield
    • Obsessed
    • Resources
  • BIRTHDAYS
    • Birthdays Categorized
    • Happy Birthday List
  • DREAMS
  • POEMS
  • CONTACT

2018

July 23 – Monica Lewinsky gets enlisted to stop the war on stop signs

July 23 – Monica Lewinsky gets enlisted to stop the war on stop signs

Sure, be against overseas military mobilization. And of course, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with advocating against the unrelenting ruin of our environment. Hell, it’s your right and almost duty to share your political stances with your neighbours. But come on

iansmitty July 23, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

July 22 – Shawn Michaels gets the freebooter’s attempt to live up to his name, along with a ridiculous coincidence

July 22 – Shawn Michaels gets the freebooter’s attempt to live up to his name, along with a ridiculous coincidence

A skinny little DJ Qualls-esque fool breaks into a house. He enters through a window while sneaky music plays. TF starts looking around for anything valuable. Eventually he sees a computer and picks it up. At that moment, but before

iansmitty July 22, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

July 21 – Yusuf Cat Islam Stevens gets eulopologetical

July 21 – Yusuf Cat Islam Stevens gets eulopologetical

Around twice a year, I relay an anecdote in which I apologized to someone I mistreated in the past. It didn’t actually happen. The apology didn’t, anyway. The mistreatment did. By pretending that I have apologized, it almost feels as

iansmitty July 21, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

July 20 – Judy Greer gets an allergy reaction

July 20 – Judy Greer gets an allergy reaction

I am sitting in my desk on the first day of school, next to a new girl who appears nervous, as she should. The principal’s voice can be heard over the intercom. “We have a new student in Grade 2

iansmitty July 20, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

July 19 – Jim Norton gets a Colombian standoff

July 19 – Jim Norton gets a Colombian standoff

Kelly and I land in Colombia at night and take a taxi to the place we’re staying. After dropping off our bags, we go for a walk around Cartagena’s Walled City. The streets are mostly deserted, but the first person

iansmitty July 19, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

July 18 – Kristen Bell gets the days other things happened

July 18 – Kristen Bell gets the days other things happened

With music already come and gone, we must press on together to find out what else happened when: June 16, 1940 – The day Wilford Brimley’s swimming instructor is corrected when he praises his student’s natural fishiness with a, “Great

iansmitty July 18, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

July 17 – David Hasselhoff gets the days the music did stuff

July 17 – David Hasselhoff gets the days the music did stuff

You know about music, enough to make it with your little sing songs anyway. But do any of us really know music? It had lived a life, and in the end, that’s all anyone can ever hope for. Formative and

iansmitty July 17, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays 1 Comment Read more

July 16 – Barry Sanders gets a fictional second meeting with a local filmmaker

July 16 – Barry Sanders gets a fictional second meeting with a local filmmaker

Mara: Ian, do you know Jordan? Jordan: Nice to meet you. Ian: We’ve actually met before, but I’m kind of glad you don’t remember. Jordan: Why, what happened? Ian: Well it was at a party at Emily and Matt’s last

iansmitty July 16, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

July 15 – Jesse Ventura gets a corpse collector’s prelude

July 15 – Jesse Ventura gets a corpse collector’s prelude

Last year, about four thousand people successfully scaled Mount Everest, the highest peak in the world. It isn’t the hardest climb in the world, or the longest, but it is the highest. And that’s all anybody cares about. Many alpinists

iansmitty July 15, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more

July 14 – Jane Lynch gets stuck with a bumper’s cryptic message

July 14 – Jane Lynch gets stuck with a bumper’s cryptic message

The other day I’m driving behind this truck and notice its lone bumper sticker that read, “I may be old, but at least I still have my hands.” Confused as an autumnal Chinese philosopher, I repeat the declaration out loud

iansmitty July 14, 2018December 30, 2018 HappyBirthdays No Comments Read more
  • « Previous
  • Next »
Copyright © 2025 iSmith. Powered by WordPress. Theme: Spacious by ThemeGrill.
  • Projects
  • Stories
  • Dreams
  • Poe, A Tree!
  • Happy Birthday!
  • Resources
  • Contact