I have a friend whose internet alter ego is a poorly-executed play on your name. One night many years ago, I drunkenly challenged this friend to eat only Hawkins Cheezies for a week, figuring he would laugh it off and
January 21 – Paul Allen goes on tour with Secret Connection
With everything else you’ve accomplished, I see you’re also a practicing guitarist. I myself dabble in the craft, but I’m moreso interested in digging deep and finding out what other guitarists and other musicians are up to. And that’s why
Nibbling
[Editor’s note: The following was written in and about a competition that took place in 2013. The author has since shown significant maturation and understands why he should never have taken part in this madness.] Beginning on the midnight between
Trivial Teamwork
I go to trivia alone in a basement bar, descending the stairs to reach the main floor. I sit at a long rectangular table and team up with a straight couple and another girl. The girl gets up and leaves,
Speed Dreamin’
Me, Kelly, and Norah rob a convenience store. I’m the getaway driver. I stop a woman, who’s only going into the store to ask directions to a restaurant called Jalapeño Heaven, from entering. We escape in Kelly’s car, which Norah
Grocery Story
A 7.5kg bag of cat food is on sale for $3.49 in a grocery store in a different city than my own. There might be enough room in the car, but even if there isn’t I will just dump out