Now I’m a bit of a filmophile. Oh, how I philes those films, yes sir. More than video games, history, or even sports. Altman surpasses Megaman in most every way. Kurosawa topples Hirohito. Spielberg over Roethlisberg. I analyze their works of these directors with a stringent intent, furiously scribbling notes with a pen and a pad, tryin’ to get this damn critique off, hoping to glean some sort of their insight to help me in my own wayward life.

But no matter the quality of the movie on the screen in front of me, my thoughts inevitably wander, returning to a single film that, while not perfect, is the one I bring up in conversation more than any other. As you may now glean, it features you and stars Justin Timeberlake, whose name hides within it the fitting title.

My passion for and interest in In Time extend far beyond the premise, in which instead of money, time is the currency, and when you run out of time, you dead. Oh yeah, and everyone is basically the same age, whatever age it is you are when you’re the most attractive. Oh yeah, and poor people live in slummy sectors of the world, and they all seem to work at some factory where their pay (in time, mind you) keeps getting reduced, to the dismay of said poor people. Justin loves his mom (you) and tries to run to where you are because you’re running out of time (and therefore life), but he doesn’t make it in time and so you dead. He drowns his sorrows in some sort of time-related alcohol, and the next morning, wakes up to discover he’s been gifted a shitload of time by a mysterious handsome stranger he went drinking with who happened to be quite rich (in time).
With no reason to stay in his slummy sector, and suddenly flush with years (of time), he travels to increasingly wealthy sectors until he’s at the best one, where Pete from Mad Men runs the show. Anyway, a bunch of stuff happens and they play poker and then he finds Pete’s bank (of time) and distributes it evenly in some socialist power move. This part is mostly irrelevant, and the part with Pete’s daughter too.

What’s truly fascinating about this film, from a moviephile’s keen eye, is how it relates to so many of life’s situations. I won’t get into them here, but it’s most, which you’ll notice if you ever have a conversation with me. Which you won’t, because of your fame and all.

March 10 – Olivia Wilde gets my favourite movie of in time
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